twenty-something

Duncan walked out of my apartment in the middle of a "discussion" this morning because he "felt like i needed to leave to avoid fighting." Thing is, doing so made something out of nothing -- said discussion was really minor, and couldn't been dealt with in two minutes, had he paid it a little mind. But, no, he just left. Without saying good-bye. Which pissed me off. And, apparently, he sent some phantom text message that never went through.

And, currently, I am having an AIM conversation with him that's going nowhere, about whether or not we are going to follow through with our plans to see a movie today.

And -- oh boy -- Sarah McLachlan's ever-depressing "Do What You Have To Do" comes on random iTunes right at this very moment...

It's not going well. I just typed "whatever" in his listing of the films playing.

I don't want to act this way towards him. It's just, two years in, it's so much fucking work... and I don't like this person I am, right now, fighting with him on IM. I don't like being with a person who would simply walk out during a fight.

All I want is for him to say, "I'm sorry."

Maybe I need some space. I just don't know.

Looks like it's Spanglish at 6:35. It will go one of two ways: (1) I will instantly forgive him the instant I see him, and we will have a good time, or (2) I will be a bitch, and it will be awkward and miserable, and no fun at all. I feel like I might just dump him tonight. That's can't be good. But maybe since I've predicted it, since I've written it, I've jinxed myself, and now it can't come true.

I haven't seen all of Dirty Dancing ever, in all my gay life, but isn't there some line like, "Nobody walks out on, baby. Nobody."? No? I'm making that up, aren't I?