twenty-something

October 8 marks the first "birthday" of my late night program's start (and the year-and-one-month anniversary in my job). The milestone passes with little fanfare -- I noted it to my staff, and on the program's website -- and I suppose that's the way it should be. I'm just surprised -- I usually make a much bigger deal of things of this nature.

I received a major reward for my work over the past year-and-one-month: a surprise (and hefty) raise, which took me completely off guard this week. It really came out of the blue, but the timing couldn't have been, well, better or worse, depending on which side of my brain you're talking too.

See, I've always sort of said that I love this job -- that it's perfect for me, if only for right now, and I'd be hard pressed to find a position that blended my interests and talents so deliciously -- BUT it was just "for now." The now I never defined, trying to be Mr. Live-in-the-Moment. But as I headed into my second year as a professional staff person at the college I graduated from, I made the command decision to apply to graduate schools for next fall, to job search, to keep my options open and to, mostly likely, leave Vermont sometime next summer.

So after spending a lonely weekend researching graduate schools on the web, I come into work one morning and find that my boss has a nice surprise waiting for me: a nearly $7K raise.

Small potatoes to some, but to me, to this 24-year-old who's still digging staying up late, planning events, and making pretty posters, that $7K will make a big difference in the coming months and, perhaps, a world of difference when it comes time to make the big decisions about my future. I'm sad to say that money could be such a major factor in my future -- but right now, it makes sense to stay, live more comfortably, and try to save. After all, it's hard to find a job like mine -- especially one that pays like mine now does, without a Master's.

I've been stressed a lot lately, by the job I so desperately love. It's been a rough fall -- busy, full of conflicts, colder than I remembered -- but my rewards (the raise, my new Powerbook) make it worth it, in a non-Buddhist sense. Sure, it's going to make my next big decision that much harder, but at least now the option of staying is a bit more feasible, if only for monetary reasons. I'm just glad to be privileged enough to have options right now -- and maybe that's the biggest prize of all.